Match Preview

Captain, Adrian Jones

''We find ourselves being attacked from two fronts. Admiral Fawcett has mustered a Naval Taskforce called "The Shipwrecks" who are law unto themselves, scrotes, beady eyed, scurvy ridden old blokes honkin bits of kit from the West Congleton Kodiaks are approaching with contact expecting about 1030. Kenilworth Pirates have sailed and are currently pillaging the town of Crewe as of 1500, arriving on our shores at 1730.

Battle commences at 1200 in a tri tournament, the boots have been dusted off and backs sprained to pick them up, rugby kit has been festering for 2 years unwashed in kit bags. The Shipwrecks will be expected to repel both attacks and socialise until the early hours. Live music will be on from 1900 to dislocate your hips if you can stand up by then it will be a tremendous day watching the 13s and 1s and socialising like vets do, enjoy the day.''